My apologies if this blog post is a little longer than normal and splattered with literary references, but I am an English major. :)
First Question: Who are you?
The age old question posed by the caterpillar in Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland is one that has been stalking me throughout these past days. I suppose now is a good time to explain that I'm doing quite a bit of soul searching on this trip, trying to discover who I am, and in particular who God thinks I am. As I go about each day, I find occasion to ask, "Who do you think I am, God? How do you see me?" I've received a variety of answers, but today's answer struck me while we were doing our activity with the girls. Today we talked about owls: how they are associated with wisdom, how God has wisdom, how He gives us wisdom, etc. Part of that discussion was spending time in prayer to ask God to give us wisdom. As I was praying for Him to give wisdom to the girls, I felt Him whisper, "You are loved. Show them that love." A derivative of a line from The Miracle Worker spun through my head, "But, they aren't even my children! How can I love them?" I again felt God's gentle whisper, "You are loved. I love you unconditionally. You're not loving them; you're showing them my love." (Get ready for another literary reference!) It was at this point I remembered the book I was reading this morning. Yesterday we were still sticking close to home to make sure everyone was feeling healthy again; so I had downloaded a book to read on my Kindle to pass the time. It was actually a series of books that I had read before, two years ago: Ted Dekker's Black, Red, White, & Green, which if you haven't read them, I highly recommend them! The chapter I was reading this morning was sharing the main character's first encounter with the love of God, described as the Great Romance in the book. God tells Thomas, the main character, that He created him, that He loves him, and that it is his task to share that love with others. The love of God is described with lots of action verbs in this passage: cherish, rescue, choose, protect, and lavish, just to name a few! God's purpose is wrapped up in love, which makes sense since the Bible tells us that God is love; and love is meant to be an action!
Second Question: How do I show them your love?
So, then my second question arose. How was I supposed to show God's love to these girls? I don't speak their language; I barely even know them! I've seen them three times at this point? Four if you count church. I was definitely at a loss for how to proceed as we continued with the activity. It wasn't until we'd cleaned up the colored pencils, the papers, the trash, and dispersed to amuse ourselves until it was time to eat lunch that I found my answer. I'll admit it. I was still kind of at a loss as I floated from place to place in the home, trying to find a place that felt right. I was rather confused about the whole "share love" mission; and I was simply trying to find some way to be productive. I finally found myself sitting on the floor while one of the girls played with my hair. She'd walked me through several steps to get to this point, like when you play house with a child and they role play what's been modeled for them. Put your shoes under the bed. Straighten the furniture. Take off your glasses. Pretend eyeshadow. Pretend lipstick. Pretend to put in your earrings. Sit on the floor. Let down your hair. (At some point in there I did put my glasses back on...) And then nothing but the gentle fingers of a child running through my hair. As I sat on the floor, I began to realize what had just transpired. This was how her Mom showed her love. While I was still thinking about this, another girl came and curled up on the floor with me, placing her head in my lap. Unconsciously, I began to rub her back and her hair, softly singing as I did so. That gentle whisper in my heart: This is love. Can you picture it? Little Indian girl, sitting on the bed, playing with the American's hair. American, sitting on the floor, playing with another little Indian girl's hair. A chain of love. Love is playing with hair.
First Question: Who are you?
The age old question posed by the caterpillar in Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland is one that has been stalking me throughout these past days. I suppose now is a good time to explain that I'm doing quite a bit of soul searching on this trip, trying to discover who I am, and in particular who God thinks I am. As I go about each day, I find occasion to ask, "Who do you think I am, God? How do you see me?" I've received a variety of answers, but today's answer struck me while we were doing our activity with the girls. Today we talked about owls: how they are associated with wisdom, how God has wisdom, how He gives us wisdom, etc. Part of that discussion was spending time in prayer to ask God to give us wisdom. As I was praying for Him to give wisdom to the girls, I felt Him whisper, "You are loved. Show them that love." A derivative of a line from The Miracle Worker spun through my head, "But, they aren't even my children! How can I love them?" I again felt God's gentle whisper, "You are loved. I love you unconditionally. You're not loving them; you're showing them my love." (Get ready for another literary reference!) It was at this point I remembered the book I was reading this morning. Yesterday we were still sticking close to home to make sure everyone was feeling healthy again; so I had downloaded a book to read on my Kindle to pass the time. It was actually a series of books that I had read before, two years ago: Ted Dekker's Black, Red, White, & Green, which if you haven't read them, I highly recommend them! The chapter I was reading this morning was sharing the main character's first encounter with the love of God, described as the Great Romance in the book. God tells Thomas, the main character, that He created him, that He loves him, and that it is his task to share that love with others. The love of God is described with lots of action verbs in this passage: cherish, rescue, choose, protect, and lavish, just to name a few! God's purpose is wrapped up in love, which makes sense since the Bible tells us that God is love; and love is meant to be an action!
Second Question: How do I show them your love?
So, then my second question arose. How was I supposed to show God's love to these girls? I don't speak their language; I barely even know them! I've seen them three times at this point? Four if you count church. I was definitely at a loss for how to proceed as we continued with the activity. It wasn't until we'd cleaned up the colored pencils, the papers, the trash, and dispersed to amuse ourselves until it was time to eat lunch that I found my answer. I'll admit it. I was still kind of at a loss as I floated from place to place in the home, trying to find a place that felt right. I was rather confused about the whole "share love" mission; and I was simply trying to find some way to be productive. I finally found myself sitting on the floor while one of the girls played with my hair. She'd walked me through several steps to get to this point, like when you play house with a child and they role play what's been modeled for them. Put your shoes under the bed. Straighten the furniture. Take off your glasses. Pretend eyeshadow. Pretend lipstick. Pretend to put in your earrings. Sit on the floor. Let down your hair. (At some point in there I did put my glasses back on...) And then nothing but the gentle fingers of a child running through my hair. As I sat on the floor, I began to realize what had just transpired. This was how her Mom showed her love. While I was still thinking about this, another girl came and curled up on the floor with me, placing her head in my lap. Unconsciously, I began to rub her back and her hair, softly singing as I did so. That gentle whisper in my heart: This is love. Can you picture it? Little Indian girl, sitting on the bed, playing with the American's hair. American, sitting on the floor, playing with another little Indian girl's hair. A chain of love. Love is playing with hair.
Love IS playing with hair, or painting fingernails, or sharing smiles....Thanks for being a conduit of God's love to these precious ones Kathleen!
ReplyDeleteYou will never know until eternity what an impact you made with this loving jesture!
ReplyDeletePraying for you, Kathleen.